Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)


Not doing this 1 thing is killing her attraction. What NOT to do in your marriage!

Patting yourself on the back because you and your wife never fight?

Uh oh.

Back up there for a sec.

The lack of conflict in your marriage?

Not so good.

Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)

Avoiding Conflict Kills Her Attraction

In this article, I talked about ‘Brutal Truth #3’ when it comes to attraction.

The brutal truth you may not realize is that a woman … your wife … is highly attracted to a man who is willing to stand his ground.

And she loses attraction when you shy away from conflict.

The reason this truth is brutal is because it’s completely counter-intuitive and goes against everything you’ve been taught.

Stop Being a Nice Guy

Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)

Conflict – sometimes you just have to scrap it out.

You’ve been taught that nice guys respect women and give in to keep the peace.

And over the years you’ve learned by experience that when you stand your ground and argue with her, you sometimes lose out on sex.

At least, short term.

But here’s the deal …

Addressing Conflict Increases Her Attraction

Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)

Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)

The very act of having the courage of your convictions and addressing conflict decisively and productively with your wife may make her angry in the immediate present, but it increases long-term attraction and desire.

Stop for a sec and really take that in …

Engaging in conflict with your wife increase her attraction and desire in the long term.

She needs you to challenge her when she’s being unreasonable. She needs you to have the courage to stand up to her. She needs you to engage with her.

When she (metaphorically) pushes you, she needs you to push back.

Strong Boundaries Make for Strong Attraction

And when you push back, attraction grows.

She’s constantly testing your boundaries. She needs the safety of knowing those boundaries are rock solid.

And I know your motto is ‘don’t sweat the small stuff’, but how’s that going for you?

Not so well, right?

She’s lost attraction, sex has taken a nosedive from its glory days.

She’s at best, lukewarm.

Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)

Do This, Instead

Now that you know what NOT to do … don’t avoid conflict … how do you go about putting it in action?

Avoiding conflict has become second nature to you, how can you possibly turn that around?

Here’s what you do …

1. Pick 1 Thing

Pick one topic that inevitably inspires conflict in your marriage.

It needs to be one that’s important to you … let’s say, she constantly complains because you work too many hours. But you know that those hours of work are crucial to your career success.

Search your motives and make absolutely sure that the hours you’re working are, in fact, necessary and that you don’t have any hidden motives.

If you’re rock-solid in your own mind, then okay, this is a hill you can die on.

2. Prepare Yourself in Advance

Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)

Sacrifice short-term appeasement to build long term attraction

Mentally prepare for the inevitable conflict the next time you have to work late or go in early.

You don’t have to come up with a lot of reasons or rationale.

A simple statement … “Working long hours is part of my job and gives us the standard of living we now enjoy. You’re going to have to come to terms with it.”


That’s it.

3. Harden Yourself to Her Irritation

Yes, she’ll likely be angry.

So what?

You must have the courage of your convictions.

When you know you’re right, you must stand your ground. This is what builds attraction and gives her a feeling of safety.

I know it will feel bad in the short-term, but you’ll be doing your marriage huge favors in terms of attraction and respect.

Sacrifice short-term appeasement for long-term attraction and desire.

And hot sex.

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