Trying to get her to crave more excitement in the bedroom, but she’s just never into it?
3 keys to get the intensity & passion you need!
You’ve wanted her all day long, only to have her turn you down flat when you try to initiate.
You want that excitement, that passion, that rush that used to be there with her. She’s content to surf Facebook all night, only to say she’s too tired at bedtime.
How do you get her to crave more excitement in the bedroom like you do?
3 Keys to Get Her to Crave More Excitement
Okay, let’s start with a key insight that is vital if you’re trying to build attraction in your marriage and create a more passionate sex life …
If you google ‘more exciting sex life’, hundreds of articles pour forth. They tell you to add new positions, new locations, fantasize together, talk it out, schedule sex, and so on.
But they’ve got it all wrong!
None of that is going to work until you understand this one key concept.
Exciting Life = Exciting Sex
Adventure & Adrenaline – Gateway to Intense Sex with Your Wife
How to Get Her to Crave More Excitement in the Bedroom
Your sex life directly reflects what’s going on in your life.
You can’t have excitement and pleasure without adrenaline and dopamine, the ‘molecule of more’.
If you have nothing exciting going on in your life … nothing that challenges you … nothing that thrills and exhilarates you … your sex life inevitably goes flat.
You have to add intensity to your day-to-day life in order to add intensity in the bedroom.
‘Dopamine-Mining’ Your Sex Life
The ‘Anti-Excitement’ Cocktail
When you’re looking for a more passionate sex life, the first thing is to look at how you’re spending your time outside the bedroom.
For a lot of us, our lives are really boring! Routine. Predictable. Repetitive. Bland.
Responsibilities, expectations, pressures, and deadlines.
It’s the ‘anti-excitement’ cocktail.
No time for yourself. No excitement and pleasure. No mountain-top experiences where your heart pounds and adrenaline floods your brain.
No dopamine moments.
The problem is we are not meant to live like this!
Men’s brains, especially, are hardwired to crave exhilaration and novelty. When excitement in your day-to-day life is short on the ground, it’s natural to try to extract it from your sex life.
You’re trying to ‘dopamine-mine’ your sex life.
But it never works.
Because what flips the switch on a woman’s responsive desire and makes her crave more excitement in the bedroom is a man’s primal energy, his raw passion.
But how do you exude raw passion and excitement when you spent the day on your computer in your home office?
How do you ‘take her like a caveman’ when the most exciting moment of your day was your Amazon delivery?
It’s impossible.
When You Want Her to Crave More Excitement
It doesn’t work to try and extract dopamine solely from your sex life. You have to do it the other way around!
You have to add exciting activities that create dopamine in your day-to-day life that you then pour back into your marriage and your sex life.
See how that works?
Michael’s Question – How do I get her to crave more excitement in our sex life?
Michael’s Question – How do I get her to crave more excitement in our sex life?“How do I have ‘primal passion’ when I work at home on a computer all day? How do I find my inner caveman?”
Michael; early 40’s, married 8 years, 1 child.
Michael’s sex life has all but disappeared. Once a month for the most part, but sometimes even worse.
He recently went 3 months with no sex! That was the tipping point when he reached out to me.
Recently, he and his wife had this huge blow-up where he initiated, and she turned him down.
(Don’t do this, by the way! It takes a huge hit on attraction. Do this instead when she turns you down.)
Michael wanted to know how to get her to crave more excitement.
As we walked through his day and what led to the fight, a light went off for him and he realized it wasn’t only sex he was wanting.
Because even though Michael’s life is good … he’s healthy, has a good job, a solid income, a beautiful home and family … basically, no structural issues … his life is also very … routine.
He works from his home office so it’s not like there’s a ton of adventure or excitement abounding.
He feels like he should spend evenings with his wife, so he doesn’t hang out with his friends much anymore. Usually, the most rewarding part of his day is cooking dinner with his wife and watching TV with her at night.
The night of the blow-up, he had a very quiet day … worked from home, minimal interactions, not a lot of fun in the picture.
Desperately Seeking Dopamine
So by that evening, he was craving something fun … something exciting … something to break the routine.
And he started to build this plan in his mind of how great sex would be that night.
By the time his wife got home, he was geared up for excitement and intensity.
Only problem …
She wasn’t.
And he didn’t have enough excitement from his own day to let that ‘primal caveman’ out and help her flip the switch on her responsive desire.
So, it all fell flat.
This was a lightbulb moment for Michael!
He started to realize how routine his life had become … how many exciting activities he had given up once he got married.
Michael was putting all his eggs in his wife’s basket, expecting her to supply what was lacking in his life. And feeling angry with her because she couldn’t.
This was the turning point for him, where he realized he had to stop relying on his wife and his sex life for excitement, and focus on building his own life first.
The Solution
How You Get Her to Crave More Excitement
Add excitement to your own life first so you can pour it back into your marriage and sex life.
1. Have an Adventure!
Go do something exhilarating at least once a week. Something challenging that makes your heart pound and your pulse race!
Rock climbing, hiking, boxing gym, jiu jitsu, ropes courses, go-karts, sim racing, biking.
If you don’t know what you like, just start trying different things.
Yup, your wife will think you’ve lost your mind. Doesn’t matter. She’s going to get back the man she married in the first place.
Remember: You’re not being selfish! This all benefits both of you; she just doesn’t realize it yet. It’s your job to show her.
2. Work Out with Other Men
It’s not enough to work out at home. You need to work out at a gym with other men.
You need the challenge, the camaraderie, the accountability, the testosterone that comes from being around other guys.
3. Go Out with Your Guy Friends
This is crucial. Most men let guy-time fall away once they get married. This makes them over-reliant on their wife. Which makes them needy and kills attraction.
You need the support, the fun, the sense of having connections with someone other than your wife.
If your friend group has all but disappeared over the years, you need to start expanding your social circle. Going to the gym will help. So will finding new activities. You’ve just got to get out there!
Your wife may not be supportive at first about you going out. That’s okay because she is going to love the results of a happier, more excited, more exciting husband.
DO THESE 3 THINGS and you’re going to love when the excitement in your bedroom starts reflecting the excitement of your day-to-day life!
Turned Down Again? The Perfect Response
Turned down again by your wife? Avoid these attraction killers. Instead, the perfect response to rebuild attraction!
Why She’s Not Giving You the Respect You Deserve
Frustrated that she doesn’t listen to you or care about what you want? Stop your nice guy ways. “Going with the flow” is killing her respect AND your sex life! She NEEDS you to be firm with her!
Not Doing This 1 Thing Is Killing Her Attraction (what NOT to do!)
Women respect…and desire…a man who is willing to stand his ground. Every time you walk away from a fight, it kills her attraction & your sex life. Do this, instead!
